Gutter Mouth

Here's one for the memory banks.

My 5 yr. old Kindergartener has homework every night. Just little 2 minute exercises like 'write your name 3 times'. I guess this is to get them into the swing of doing homework, but for him it's just busy work that he can do in 30 seconds flat.

Anyway, when I was at work the other evening he did his homework with the babysitter. The homework for that night was 'write 5 words that start with SH'. Here was his list:

SHUT UP
SHIT
SHIP
SHUCKS
SHAME

(talk about free association)

Well, both the babysitter and I briefly mentioned to him that we did not think this was a good idea, but he was sticking to his guns. I did not make a big deal about it, because I didn't think it was that big of a deal, and he knew exactly what he was doing, and frankly I just forgot about it.

His teacher emerged from school at pick up yesterday, with his book in hand, and a big post it signifying the page. Suffice to say, she was horrified. The conversation went something like this:

TEACHER: opens the book to the page. Silent pause. 'What's with this?'

ME: 'Oh..yeah. He did that with the babysitter' (lame excuse or what!) 'But we did mention to him that this was not a good idea'.

TEACHER: 'I could not give him his sticker today'

ME: 'OK', shrugging my shoulders.

silent pause

TEACHER: 'Is this a problem at home?'

ME: 'Well, sort of, but not really' again, shrugging my shoulders

TEACHER: 'He uses these words at home?'

ME: 'Yes. He does have a big brother you know' (again, deflecting the responsibility)

silent pause

TEACHER: 'Wow'. Just glances at me in amazement.

ME: 'How was the day otherwise?'

TEACHER: 'Otherwise his day was fine'

So then I said something about how there are bigger battles to fight or something like this and casually left, while she said goodbye still obviously flabbergasted by the event and at my nonchalance about the whole thing.

Well, I cracked up when I turned the corner. Look, she's obviously right. The kid should not be using swear words, especially for homework. But I do feel that given all I have to deal with with this little monkey, swear words are the least of my problems. And, more importantly, if I make a big deal about it, he is going to take it and run. He will be swearing every other word! He's already started; this morning I heard 2 'assholes' coming out of his mouth. I am not suggesting this be ignored, but it should be kept in proportion. And look, I talked to him about it, and frankly it was a good lesson; if he's going to pull shit.. opps, I mean stunts like that, he's going to get into trouble. It's his choice. Yes, we did start the 'swear jar' again, but frankly, I think the whole thing is small potatoes. My feeling is, I don't care much about swear words, but others do, and my kids have better be prepared to deal with that and learn some discretion.

As far as I'm concerned his teacher never indicated that there were certain words that were off limits. The assignment implied that anything goes, as long as it started with SH. Look, he spelled all his words correctly, and his penmanship was proficient. As far as I'm concerned he gets his check plus for the day (the plus for creativity and imagination).